Swan song

So hello out there. whoever you are who chanced upon this blog that was once a safe haven. sadly it has been ravaged beyond repair and i will be moving to a new home. no teaser links or anything, this is the goodbye of the second fiddle.

there are a million billion and one things racing through my mind now that need clearing and venting, cant believe i have to bloody register 4 another blog to do that. #@$#”>#@$#%^&#!!!!!

one thing i do not understand is why i have 44 hits on saturday, up from my usual 4-7 hits. the most logical hit count to expect is around 20. 27 if we are being conservative(or not too conservative, fuck) But 44? that just doesn’t gel

its 7am and i haven’t slept through the night so i dont particularly care if i’m making sense. boo ya.

oh and thanks for dropping by yo

 Postnote: I still love my baby girl deep deep deep deep deep

Random rant

this has gotta stop. i cant keep thinking of her. i need to get my life back together. its not her fault shes so amazing. but since she is if she is in my life i’m fucked. all i’ll ever think of is her and that will not do. so the next time we meet it will be our last goodbye.

strange thing is whenever anyone called her ‘mom’ i’d say ‘man, you didnt even invite me for your wedding’ and shed say ‘you missed your own wedding’ now she really wont invite me to her wedding. thinking of running into her 5 or 8 years later and seeing someone else holding her hand, seeing someone else making her laugh makes me want to rip my heart out so it wont hurt so much.

but between responsibility and pleasure, responsibility is a clear choice.

so goodbye sweetheart. i dont know if i ever will give you the link to this site or let you read this but if i ever do or if you ever do chance upon this please know that theres noone i’ve ever loved as much as i love you and if i really doubt i’ll ever be this serious about another girl cuz shes gonna have to match up to you which is no easy task.

i was very blessed and lucky to have you in my life for the past few months and theres nothing i would change about them, not one second.

i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you and i will never stop loving you

 please move on and have a great life for it is only when you smile that my brain stops functioning and i smile too

i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you